The National Punches You in the Throat

It's been a while since I've been to a show this good. I didn't want it to end. The video and the pictures don't do it justice. The National has been gaining fans at a steady pace and for good reason. In May 2013 I saw them play their song "Sorrow" for 6 hour straight on repeat and they made it sound new each time. This band takes music to the next level in a way that bands don't often do these days.

I went on Wednesday June 18th to the Prospect Park Bandshell where the opening band was Lord Huron. Their music is a mix of bluegrass, folk, and indie. Because I knew they were opening for The National, I spent a week journeying through their album and familiarized myself with some of their songs. Hands down, "She Lit a Fire" is a favorite (maybe because it stirred some personal emotions for me).

The night before that, Phosphorescent opened for them and I wish I could've seen that show as well. I saw Phosphorescent play at an old theater in the middle of a small town in Connecticut about a year ago and it was amazing. The National picked some great opening acts that are up-and-coming in indie music and enough can't be said for both these bands. 

But nothing compares to the show that Matt Berninger put on. He was a mix of rock star gone mad to emotionally connecting to each song he sang. Having seen his brother's documentary Mistaken for Strangers, I immediately saw the struggle for Berninger when he messed up lyrics or something went wrong. He acted out his frustration a bit and threw beer into the crowd, dropped his mic, hit himself with his mic stand to the point of bleeding, and even tossed a fan's phone. But it was totally worth getting punched in the throat (yes, this happened) to see this show. Especially when Sufjan Stevens showed up.

Don't Take Pictures of Bearded Men

Trying to catch a picture of two bearded men having a legitimate meeting in an office is probably as easy as trying to take a picture of two zebras stopping for a drink at a watering hole. I don't really know why I was trying to do this. I think the attempt was to create some sort of quirky post on Facebook in order to illicit laughter, conversation, and likes.

I work at a huge company. Like very huge and very important. Except, I work in customer service and everyone who does not work in the customer service part of this huge company does something creative. On any given day there will be a writer, model, or photographer walking past my desk. Well, this particular bearded man is very attractive. He is one of the people who walks past my desk at least five times a week and all I can think is, "he needs to cut that beard." Now mind you, my last boyfriend had a beard, so I don't discriminate, but my ex's beard was of a normal, average length. With this guy, I can't help but think every time I see him that there must be food of lunches past still haunting it.

Again, he is very attractive and the other day I saw him with another attractive man with a long beard having what looked like a meeting. What are the odds that these two met at our workplace and had important things to talk about? Were they talking about beard competitions? Were they discussing their latest post on our prestigious newspaper site? I don't know, but I very un-tactfully tried to take a picture from a safe distance. I was caught. They stopped their conversation mid-sentence, turned, and stared right at me. 

I walked down the hall in a direction that allowed me no exit and called my mom. My mom was probably wondering why on God's green earth I would ever call her since most days I rush her off the phone. But she saved me, I was able to turn back around looking like I had a legitimate reason to be coming back. Looking like I also had important meetings to attend and calls to take. At least this is what I imagine is the case.

The moral of the story is that men with really long beards should only be seen in natural habitats. Say, perhaps, an absinthe bar on Bedford Avenue in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Or maybe writing in their moleskine journals in the park on a bench on a lazy Sunday afternoon. Never should they be seen at work. Especially if the office where they work also houses a famous Republican news source in the same building. These bearded men don't wear suits, they wear plaid, and they have deadlines, dammit. Important deadlines. It's just a shame I couldn't get a picture.

5 Moments That Make You Feel Like a New Yorker

Whether you've lived in NYC your whole life or you have been here for just a few years, here are 5 moments that will instantly make you feel like a New Yorker.

1. Almost getting hit by a car: My moment occurred in Brooklyn. I had right of way, a pizza delivery car turned down the street and almost hit me. He was on his phone and had a Russian accent. I for the first time shamelessly swore at someone with every bad word I could think of while kicking his car...and it came naturally.
2. Yelling out of a window for some reason: Maybe this is a Brooklyn thing, but when it's three in the morning and some idiot is standing outside your window and being loud for no reason, it's time to take matters into your own hands. Open the window and yell to your heart's content.
3. Getting stuck in the doors of a train as they close: Everyone hates when this happens, but you're truly a New Yorker when you're the one it's happening to. I for one and am not waiting 15 more minutes for another D train to come.
4. Eating an egg and cheese on a hard roll: Yours might also have bacon or sausage or both. But you got it on the corner deli (bodega) and it's probably accompanied by a coffee that has more sugar and cream in it than actual coffee.
5. Seeing a person you wish you could date: There's always that moment whether it's after you've been out drinking with your friends all night or you're on your way home from Whole Foods, that you see the person who looks like "The One." And usually, that person is across the platform going in the opposite direction from you.